The Idiot Has Landed

It's one of those 'fate' moments which just happens, but makes you think about the world we live in. A number of chance events and something that couldn't be replicated again in a thousand tries occurred on the way to Shanghai from Melbourne.

I was informed about a 4 hour delay - well, these things happen, I'll request an aisle seat I thought (no online check-in), ok, strike 2 out of 2 for that airline as I got a nice surprise as I stepped on the plane I had the dreaded window seat. I digress. The 'fate' moment occurred as I polished off a couple of fast food items courtesy of a $14 voucher from the airline. I had a full four hours to kill, but at that moment, mixed in with wandering the airport, I decided to proceed through customs. As I approached the gate, I noticed a work colleague who was travelling to NZ. What are the chances??? In anycase, it was a good way to kill a couple more hours and an excuse to down a few morning lagers. Thanks for the last Australian Asahi beers Panel!

On to the plane, a 'professor type' passenger managed to snag what I thought should have been my aisle seat. Commandeering the armrest and then some for the whole flight didn't improve my opinion of the man and coupled with constant sniffing, (I counted once every 20 seconds) I was on the brink of calling him a Tibetan supporter who hates Mao. Needless to say I chuckled as the second meal was reduced to 'Fish only' and he argued with the air hostesses to look for a chicken meal, only to be told none existed. Harsh, but it wasn't for an allergy as he reluctantly nibbled on the provided meal - didn't this guy realise a few years ago this was a communist country?

Having had many warnings about taxis, coupled with my apparent lack of 'street smarts' (which I'll argue!) I was wary about the airport in Shanghai. Going through customs, the criteria for x-raying baggage was whomever was stupid enough to make eye contact with them, (I'll revise that street smart argument) while locals bustled past with their porn magazines strapped to their chests. I thought to myself all the pointers, ignore those people who ask if you need a taxi and go straight to the rank, just the rank I repeated to myself. Well, thanks to the 4 hour delay, at midnight all the shifty brothers were asleep, and the taxi rank consisted of 1 person - the man who walkie talkie'd to the awaiting cabs! The next tough job was explaining my destination, however this turned out to be easily interpreted by the taxi rank man to the taxi driver and we were off!

Going 130km/hr through overpasses and freeways certainly awakened the senses, as did seeing skid marks going from one side of the freeway to the other, that led to a crashed lamborghini with deployed airbags, as the driver sheepishly walked towards the awaiting tow truck. Thankfully the apartment was still open as an earlier phone call from Melbourne was greeted with a plethora of 'yes' answers to all my questions which planted a few doubts.

I plonked my bags in the room around 1am, turned on the computer, sending an email to let people know I was coming in to work later that day...