Tuesday, September 06, 2011

I'm Too Old For This Sh!t

The line from the Lethal Weapon series - a favourite from my childhood - seemed to best describe my thoughts when I went out on Friday night. Experiencing the Shanghai nightlife, we went out to eat some Sichuan food with a group from work. With more chilies than a bowl of rice, there were even some murmurs from the locals that it was hot, while anyone who knows me understands that I can take to spicy food about as well as a dwarf competes in a tall man contest. Thankfully I was able to nibble my way through enough to line the stomach with some protection before a full night of alcohol, and we managed a very 'Australian' custom by drinking the restaurant out of cold beers.

A small group of us ventured on to a popular nightspot called M2, which drew some raised eyebrows from some of those we told. Needless to say, my name and cool places are not synonymous and I was having second thoughts on the t-shirt and jeans I decided to don. The main difference between asian and western countries in terms of clubs as far as I can gather (from around the 6 I've been to in my life), is that occupying space requires a certain amount of dough, which I found out this morning cost me to the tune of 2100 RMB ~ $320 AUD - heck that was just MY share! What this got you was a small table, a couple of bottles of whisky, a fruit platter, and a guy who transfers the whisky from the bottle to a jug. Obviously this business model tends to work better than Australia where patrons can nurse their $10 drinks for a couple of hours. With fashionistas, complete with a so-called hip-hop singer the pre-requisite 'tosser' sunglasses (gimmie a break - indoors at night??) complete with western dancers and  it was quite an experience. I can't recall the last time I went to a night club, and I don't even know if I can call it that, but there was loud music, a bunch of people dancing, and a strange dice game being played where the loser downs some of the expensive nectar that costs me more than half my flight here! It was an enjoyable experience as it's not something I'd go out to do, while it was good to see what happens with young folks these days!

We went onto another club where my guess is that the other half of my plane fare is about to sting me as this was a slightly larger table, there were more drinks and the music was louder. Geez, I don't know how people do this week in and out. This was different again, with fancy dancers strutting their stuff at regular intervals, showing patrons how it's meant to be done. Rest assured I didn't dare attempt to dance and was quite happy to guard the expensive space we had secured.

Thankfully all these spots are a stones throw from my apartment and I was able to stumble home at 4am. I hadn't had that much to drink, however I did manage to press the wrong floor and try my card in someone else's door a few times - luckily I didn't start banging on the door. While the incorrect floor I did get off had the hallmarks of a patron who didn't make it to his/her room - spew all over the elevator exit which I somehow managed to avoid. Microwaving some frozen fries and having a shower, I was knocked out in no time.

Needless to say not much else happened on the weekend. I'm too old for this sh!t...

Oh, just to put a dampener on all this cool clubbing underground scene talk, my iPad is back up and running, resetting and deleting the whole thing seemed to work, and now it's just a matter of re-syncing 7gigs of data again!

***edit: Thankfully I've now been informed the amount for the club was a *total* amount rather than each! Much more palatable and easy on the wallet!****

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At Wednesday, September 07, 2011 12:08:00 am, Blogger Zz... said...

LOl that is hilarious...you think YOU'RE TOO OLD? i just bumped into yet another old man(59) and spent near 3 hours chatting at his house...as he was an INTJ also...he completely understood why i can't relate to people my own age...grrr...it's now starting to bug me that i can't find people in this country i'd want to even be friends with...that are less than say 15-25 years older than me...and i don't look my full 30 either...so it looks bad...(25 years extra is to be safe...alot of the forty something men here are still like friggin children in this country grrr!)

At Wednesday, September 07, 2011 12:09:00 am, Blogger Zz... said...

ps $320 is a heck of a lot of dough FOR THAT! my wallet pains for you, lol lucky you expat geeks can earn...lol

At Saturday, September 10, 2011 12:36:00 pm, Blogger Jonno said...

Too old for the clubs! Edited the post as the amount was for all so we were able to split the bill. Much better on my back pocket!

At Saturday, September 17, 2011 7:46:00 pm, Blogger Zz... said...

p.s just cos the title resonates so well with me like a pleasant "zing!" i have to respond to it..."you're telling ME! geez wheez I'm finding I NEED my chats with 25year older people to STAY SANE. I often feel like I'm interacting with very primitive apes...especially where local men our age are concerned....ARGHHHH! INTJs always have reasons...feel my hermitdom is totally justified :P

At Wednesday, November 16, 2011 5:00:00 pm, Blogger yossarian said...

what? no dancing?? but i sure am glad the $320 figure was wrong!!


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